Source | LinkedIn : By Aninda Baruah
Conventional wisdom has always let the world to believe that success leads to happiness. Harvard professor and author Shawn Achor’s extensive research and other findings in the field of positive psychology have shown that it’s actually the other way round. It’s happiness that leads to success.
Analysis published by Harvard Business Review and the University of Warwick shows statistical increases in professional output owing to happiness. As per Harvard, happiness has been found to raise sales by 37%, productivity by 31%, and accuracy on tasks by 19%, in addition to improving health and quality of life in myriad ways. If you think about it, it absolutely makes sense. Whenever we are happy and positive, we are more motivated, energetic and productive, less stressed and more loved by people around. It’s tremendously powerful – this happiness and positivity. The dangerous thing is that negativity is equally powerful. It can do the exact opposite.
What intrigues me is that we don’t need massive tragic events in our lives for us to be negative and unhappy. Trivial situations in our daily life, that should not matter to us at all, become sufficient reasons to fill up our mind with poisons – enough to lend some to needy reptiles, if required. The problem is that these trivial situations would occur all the time in our lives – which would mean that we may give in to negativity and unhappiness for as many times. In addition to pulling us down, such negativity brings along with it a serious collateral damage. It can make us extremely unpopular amongst friends and colleagues!
Based on my experience and conversations with other people, below are 7 negative traits that can silently but alarmingly eat into our daily happiness.
1.) Constantly comparing with others: This one easily takes the number 1 spot. Measuring our life with others’ success will invariably result in an unhappy mind and heart. Facebook is a clear case in point. Research has shown that many Facebook users experience depression when they see other people going out on vacations, buying fancy cars etc. The thing is there will always be people who will do, have and achieve something more or different than us. So, rather than looking at others’ plates focus on yours. There is enough food on it that needs to be relished. As long as you are running on your own track and achieving your objectives, you should be happy. My mother’s lesson has always helped me in this regard –
“Whenever you feel unhappy and dissatisfied, look at the more unfortunate ones, you will start feeling grateful”
2.) Always taking things personally: The way black holes in space attract every particle towards them, the same way there are some people who, no matter what you say, will take each word of yours personally and get grumpy about it. Whatever you say, they will assume it to be targeted towards them or will take it offensively. In addition to not letting a person with such attitude live in peace, it also makes him/her extremely difficult to stay around with. Try to take things lightly. Give due consideration to the other person before quickly jumping into conclusions.