Source | FastComapny : By GWEN MORAN
Over a decade ago, business performance consultant Ryan Estis transitioned from being a salesperson out in the field to being a manager. He moved from an environment where it was his job to make customers happy to one where it was critical for him to hold his team accountable for results.
“Going from top producer to manager was literally the toughest career transition I’ve ever had to make. They’re two entirely different jobs,” he says. In professional selling, you’re even trained in ways to make people like you, such as mirroring body language.
He says that he initially failed to hold people accountable for goals out of a desire to be popular. He dodged some tough conversations. And overall, that avoidance created inconsistencies that affected performance. His team didn’t always know what to expect from him. After a number of such missteps, Estis says he overcame his people-pleasing ways by systematizing his approach, which let him take some of the emotion out of managing.
By mapping out clear goals and responsibility and accountability mechanisms, managing became more about performance. He could look at the goals and responsibilities and ensure that people were doing their jobs. When they weren’t, he could address specific actions that could be taken to improve the situation, whether an employee needed additional training or resources, or whether there were other obstacles in the way.
Everyone wants to be liked, but there’s a line between being the strong manager that everyone loves and being a people pleaser. Good managers cross it at their peril, says workplace consultant Ilene Marcus, founder of Aligned Workplace.
People pleasing includes a variety of behaviors, such as saying “yes” when you don’t mean it, using empty platitudes to ingratiate yourself to others, and avoiding difficult conversations and conflict, Marcus says. Instead, people pleasers take the path of least resistance.
Regardless of the reason, trying to please all of the people all of the time is a recipe for career disaster. Here are ways that being a people pleaser is undermining your effectiveness as a manager and how you can turn around such behavior.